Thursday, May 19, 2005

Anger Management

ALIIIIIIVE!!!  She's ALIVEEEEE!!!!!!     

Yeah...I've survived another migraine.  Ick.  Besides that, I've had a nervous breakdown of sorts.  2 nights ago, I was sitting at the table while Jesse cooked dinner and I was just quiet so he said 'What's up with you?'  I said 'Nothing.'  He said 'Ummmmm...ok, I've got 4 minutes before I gotta turn this steak.  I'm sitting down and you're gonna tell me why you're so sad.'  I looked at him, and then the tears just came and I starting talking "I'm so tired and I don't LIKE my kids right now and all they do is ask me to serve them and I don't mind most of the time but nobody appreciates me and I know I love being home all the time but I think I'm going insane and if I don't want to be home then am I a bad mother and I'm tired of being in pain from this stupid accident and not wanting to complain every day about it and <etc> .................' and I ended with a squeak and a snotty nose.  So, Jesse looked at me and said 'Honey, do you need a weekend alone?  Do you want me to send you to a resort for the weekend?  Do you want advice or do you want me to just listen?'  So needless to say, I had my spaz-out and I'm feeling a little better.  A little.    

("Oh, look.....Amy is crazy.  Everyone back away slowly."  Hee....)    

So....I'm doing bills today....all the while mumbling while I'm writing out the bills 'Here's your $127.00, you miserable <bleeping> doctor...'  'Here's your $254.00, you miserable <bleeping> electric company!'  Haaa.....I'm liking this new form of anger management.  Let's hope one of the bill collectors calls me today.  I just may pick up the phone.  ::maniacal laughter::

15 comments:

  1. domesticatedchicMay 19, 2005 at 10:54 AM

    Oh I know how it is with doctor bills.. as for your husband.. wow.. have him give my J lessons on what the right answers are when one is venting..and actually offering something cool as a trip away! lol* Hope you get to feeling better.. Lookingforward to this years hurricane season? ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Im telling you that is why we had to leave on a camping trip. No phones no neighbors no door bells no anyone like the elderly in my family asking me to do a thing>!!!!!!!!!!!! is that sad or what I mean I do owe it to them. Yes I have went offon thekids three times this week. I tell and I ask and I yell and stuff still hwere it is. Tracy borrows money from our stash the only thing I ask it to write it in the jar. So I know why a few hundred is missing. !!!!!!!!!! does she do it no!!!!!!!!!!  I go to put money up there and some is missing. I ask to empty trash they put it in a bag and on the pantry floor time i see it garbage has run. I say pick up shoes for two weeks same one only one shoe under table. I have to re clean when they do dishes and sinks and counters and stoves. IM SICK OF IT> !!!!!!! then they had the nerve to ask for a baby kitten. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO  
    you cant take care of what you got so no more animals. Fuor dogs two cats and three fish. I feel your pain and girl you have every right to let go. Your hubby is a good hubby. He reallly is. Boy ours sure do put up with a lot.
    YOur a good mom and wife. Dont let this stuff get to you. I LOVE YOU AMY!!!!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. migraines suck..do you have imitrex to take that helped me...
    being home is hard....it is for me the isolation when my kids are gone...
    I feel fat and lazy...I like working but dont like being away from the kids...not sure what age your kids are but they do go through a phase...evenutally they out grow it.. I thought my oldest who is 23 would never be normal again....
    hope thing get better...sweet of you honey to care so much...give him a big hug..
    Donna
    In
    TExas
    http://journals.aol.com.Lacaza3sweepingthecobwebsofmymind/

    ReplyDelete
  4. Amy, so glad you survived your migraine.  Woke up kind of sickly this morning with very upset stomach and a bit of a headache.  Am feeling some better now.
    I know how you feel.  I do.  Sometimes, I feel like all I am good for is to be the maid and cook.  My husband is wonderful, like Jesse.  He always senses when I am fed up.  He has been talking about taking me away for a weekend to Pine Mountain, GA.  Would be nice.  Would also be nice, if my 22 and 12 year-olds could learn to pull their weight around here so everything does not fall on me.  I love my family to pieces, but things could be so much better, if they would help out more.  We could, for one thing, have more family time together.  I could have more time to do the things I love to do as well.  I keep on dreaming.  Maybe one day..................

    http://journals.aol.com/Smjr43/Colorado

    ReplyDelete
  5. sometimes we all just need a break

    ReplyDelete
  6. Been there done that!!!  I learned to make the bill collectors my friends even giving blessings and advise to many of them.  After all after you say "I have no money and I'll pay you when I get some", what else can you talk about except them.  BTW tears are an awfully effective cure for "the Crazies".  I say bring on the tears and really put a lot into it so you get the full relief.  After the tears a simple prayer like "Lord I need help" usually does the trick.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I am so here with you!!  I totally relate.  Except I'm scrubbing floors sometimes while I'm thinking all these things and then racing home to scrub more.
    Lisa

    ReplyDelete
  8. You can go NUTSO anytime it makes you feel better, OK? rich

    ReplyDelete
  9. We've been under undo stress lately, and I've snapped at the kids too much.  I can excuse it with "there's a lot of stress right now." or I can beat myself up thinking "I'm a bad mother."  Or, I can explain to the kids that I'm under stress and I don't mean it.  They're good kids, and  yours are, too.  They can understand.  If they are being cruddy, they need to be called on it.  Maybe a weekend away is just the ticket!

    ReplyDelete
  10. I *HATE* Migraines.... sorry you had to go through one... as for the bill collectors... I HOPE they do call you because of what you will say/do! :)

    Love ya!

    ~Jaime

    ReplyDelete
  11. I had a similar melt down about a month ago!  It was a doozy.  Everything you mentioned were the things I was feeling...I wanted to run away.  I hope you are feeling better...it does help to cry and get it all out.  :)  Your hubby is a gem...he seems very understanding.  Hang in there.
    Michele

    ReplyDelete
  12. OMG - Those words came out of mouth today!!! EXACTLY!  As I sit here typing I feel like they take take take [which is ok if they act appriciative] but they don't lately!  
    Why is family like peanut brittle?  It takes a lot of sugar to hold all the nuts together!
    I can tell you this.... EVERYONE is kinda feeling this way over the next few days - Massive Solar Flares!  I believe in that stuff... If the Moon can effect our ocean why not us!  Plus earthquakes happen too... hopefully not one in Palm Springs :)
    Anyway... I really am happy I am not the only one!
    Hugs, Kendra

    ReplyDelete
  13. I hate migraines, they have to be the worse kind of pain anybody can ever have, apart from childbirth that is. Hope you feel better soon.........Jules xxxxx
    http://journals.aol.co.uk/jules19642001/Itsmylife/

    ReplyDelete
  14. wow, you are brave....I would never go to pay bills in  bad mood...rofl!!

    ReplyDelete
  15. alilcountrycharmMay 20, 2005 at 3:58 PM

    Omgoodness I feel like this too. More often than I like to admit! If you wanna talk chicy, I'm here. Hope that migraine gets better and hope those collectors DO call! <muuuhahaha>
    ((((Love & Hugs))))
    Angel

    ReplyDelete

Talk to me, people! Otherwise, I'm just talking to myself....