Backtracking a bit....I want to say a heartfelt THANK YOU to all of you who commented on the last entry. You have no idea how much some of you touched me. I have a hard time sharing how I really feel, because I have been....well.....I've grown accustomed to the fact that my feelings are rather inconvenient. I mean, I used to be fun. Then I got into a really bad car accident and everything changed. I hurt all the time. That wears on a person, and my demeanor isn't sunshine and roses most of the time, anymore. Sadly, my husband is kinda tired of hearing it...tired of me hurting all the time.....just...tired of me, I guess. Don't get me wrong; I know he loves me. The thing that sucks though, is that nowadays, he tunes me out, doesn't acknowledge things I say, or if he does, alot of the time, he is short with me. Of course, that makes me feel small. Insignificant. Unimportant. I do try not to take it personally, but I can only try for so long before I get so worn down and sad that I fall into a dark puddle and just sit there and cry. I guess I just want to feel like I matter.
Oddly enough, I talk to my psychiatrist....and he told me he thought I should lower my dosage of Lexapro. ::blink:: Um... no. BAD IDEA! I'd just be.....well....sadder. (Is that a word?) It's so odd, really....going to my psychiatrist, who sits there, listend to me, responds back to me in a way that doesn't make me feel that I'm annoying..... and I think 'okay, is it that hard for others to be that nice?' I know the guys gets paid, but still......you know?
So. There's my deal with that.
Moving along to other stuff......last night was Halloween night. We had so many kids, I gave out at least 25 BAGS of candy and went to go buy more! I saw that kids were actually being trucked into our subdivision! It was craziness! There were a considerable amount of adults without costumes asking for candy, as well. I mean, really.....I don't mind giving candy to the adults as long as they try at least a little. A mask.....even a pair of pajamas....something, you know?! Anyway, we had to actually put up an 'out of candy' sign around 9 PM. When my kids came back from trick or treating, I noticed I have given out better candy that what they got. eesh. Next year, I'm just going to buy a couple extra bags of good candy for me! (Dark chocolate Crunch bars? MMMMM)
I wasn't able to get any quality pictures since we (still) don't have a camera....but....I can't figure out how to add pictures mid-post
::hug hug hugs:: to you all....